Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The pain of real pain

For the last 4 weeks, I have had a terrible pain in my lower back. It happened 10 years ago for a couple of months and then I was careful and it went away --but on my last trip to London I was careless and carried some heavy things --and it came back with a vengeance.

I think is ciatica produced by a problem disk in my spine....A doctor will tell me more in a couple of days and I hope I will get better. Well, it has to get better because I feel useless and this depresses me very much. I am used to be on the go all the time, to walk a lot, to be independent --and this really affects my life.

And pain is such a downer, such a way to feel like a zero...Even a head-ache throws off our attitude, you can imagine what the pain from a ´pinched nerve´does for your psyque. It can cause desperation, and the biggest despair, especially when even strong pain killers dont seem to work. Pain can be the biggest equalizer, reducing us to nothing --and showing us all the importance of good health.

When one thinks about it, God must have made pain what it is, so we realize that there are things beyong our own personal power. Things we cannot control nor avoid at any cost.

Thus, I dont understand people who love to be sick, or love to say they are sick. That kind of attention is horrendous and not for me.